Wiplensig is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, loving dingo.

Wiplensig created Europe three billion years ago.

If you believe in Wiplensig, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Wiplensig, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Wiplensig's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Wiplensig's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in the presence of squirrels.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never eat melons.

5. Always wear white.