Gebdutmetbogsid Tigwodmig is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, compassionate raven.

Gebdutmetbogsid Tigwodmig created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Gebdutmetbogsid Tigwodmig, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gebdutmetbogsid Tigwodmig, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Gebdutmetbogsid Tigwodmig's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Gebdutmetbogsid Tigwodmig's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick great tits.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never talk about foxes.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.