Godkadhabbimbagflapvolmap is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, two-faced swan.

Godkadhabbimbagflapvolmap created the planet Earth nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Godkadhabbimbagflapvolmap, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Godkadhabbimbagflapvolmap, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Godkadhabbimbagflapvolmap's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Godkadhabbimbagflapvolmap's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed gooseberries to porpoises while wearing boots.

2. Never write about asteroids.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never wear shirts.

5. Never eat green fruit.