Vadzeddid is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, conceited guinea pig.

Vadzeddid created oxygen four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadzeddid, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Vadzeddid, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Vadzeddid's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Vadzeddid's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat tortoises with great respect.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never chant near turtles.

4. Never talk about doves.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.