Dumfenfigsugyogrulmap is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, witless goat.

Dumfenfigsugyogrulmap created dark matter six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dumfenfigsugyogrulmap, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Dumfenfigsugyogrulmap, she will turn you into a hamster.

Dumfenfigsugyogrulmap's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Dumfenfigsugyogrulmap's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Always treat snails with great respect.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never wear jumpers.