Podvegnatcen is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, wise bee.

Podvegnatcen created life five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Podvegnatcen, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Podvegnatcen, she will turn you into a sheep.

Podvegnatcen's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Podvegnatcen's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Feed all hungry cats.

4. Do not drink water in green rooms.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Podvegnatcen.