Bestfodbossnart is a god.

It takes the form of a large, self-assured octopus.

Bestfodbossnart created bats six million years ago.

If you believe in Bestfodbossnart, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Bestfodbossnart, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Bestfodbossnart's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Bestfodbossnart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat garlic.

2. Never think about cell theory.

3. Never think ill of sick foxes.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.