Bumcudjen is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, ill-tempered eagle.

Bumcudjen created Africa five million years ago.

If you believe in Bumcudjen, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bumcudjen, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Bumcudjen's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Bumcudjen's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bumcudjen.

2. Worship no other gods but Bumcudjen.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Erect eight aluminium sculptures of Bumcudjen on top of important buildings.

5. Always wear orange.