Jarntofpon is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, duplicitous cow.

Jarntofpon created the Sol system six million years ago.

If you believe in Jarntofpon, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Jarntofpon, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Jarntofpon's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Jarntofpon's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never talk about fluid mechanics.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Do not shave your arms.

5. Never think about solid mechanics.