Gatmabcib is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, egotistical chinchilla.

Gatmabcib created matter eight million years ago.

If you believe in Gatmabcib, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gatmabcib, he will throw large rocks at you.

Gatmabcib's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Gatmabcib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about onions.

2. Do not keep seven capybaras in a large pit.

3. Mice are not to be trusted.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never pour water over plants.