Gadcadteen is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, narcissistic fox.

Gadcadteen created the Sol system two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gadcadteen, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Gadcadteen, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Gadcadteen's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Gadcadteen's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured ants.

2. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.

3. Never talk about optics near shrews while wearing white shoes and balancing seven silver spheres on your arms.

4. Never think about spacetime near aardvarks while wearing indigo skirts and balancing five tin spheres on your neck.

5. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.