Motxin is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, competent hummingbird.

Motxin created viruses two years ago.

If you believe in Motxin, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Motxin, she will not care at all.

Motxin's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Motxin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never think about quantum gravity near horses while wearing brown boots and balancing nine iron spheres on your hands.

4. Hide from orange ducks for they are unholy.

5. Always stare at clouds.