Bopgab is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, confident eagle.

Bopgab created an up quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bopgab, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bopgab, he will boil you in a big pot.

Bopgab's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Bopgab's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Always make sure there are no snails in a building before entering it.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. You must love Bopgab.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.