Hugtithan is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, quiet sheep.

Hugtithan created viruses five million years ago.

If you believe in Hugtithan, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Hugtithan, she will jump up and down on your head.

Hugtithan's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Hugtithan's Holy Commandments

1. Never handle nickel while unclean.

2. Never remain kneeling at midnight.

3. Shun those given to sloth.

4. Do not dye your hair green.

5. Do not resist order.