Genwikkemnib is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, bad-tempered lion.

Genwikkemnib created humanity seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Genwikkemnib, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Genwikkemnib, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Genwikkemnib's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Genwikkemnib's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Genwikkemnib.

2. Never speak of fate in the presence of elders.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never talk about cell theory.

5. Do not listen to music.