Yimzenkim is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, self-assured raccoon.

Yimzenkim created the planet Mars three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yimzenkim, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Yimzenkim, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Yimzenkim's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Yimzenkim's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about spacetime.

2. Always help hamsters in need.

3. Never travel toward the north during spring.

4. Never wear ear rings.

5. Do not name children after dolphins.