Cemcatwon is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, sage badger.

Cemcatwon created an atom three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cemcatwon, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Cemcatwon, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Cemcatwon's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Cemcatwon's Holy Commandments

1. Never record secrets.

2. Do not step barefoot upon magenta earth.

3. Do not speak about turnips.

4. Do not count beyond eight during ceremonies.

5. Do not gather at towers at midnight.