Nutcebrag is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, passionate wombat.

Nutcebrag created matter seven million years ago.

If you believe in Nutcebrag, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Nutcebrag, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Nutcebrag's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Nutcebrag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about optics.

2. Never think ill of sick manatees.

3. Do not hurt voles.

4. Do not step barefoot upon turquoise earth.

5. Never talk about stars.