Gilcedquart is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, omnipotent mink.

Gilcedquart created dark energy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gilcedquart, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gilcedquart, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Gilcedquart's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Gilcedquart's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear magenta.

2. Heed all dreams.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never feed beans to dolphins while wearing indigo tights.

5. Always treat gulls with great respect.