Yokhimjop is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, awesome armadillo.

Yokhimjop created vertebrates eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yokhimjop, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Yokhimjop, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Yokhimjop's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Yokhimjop's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never mention shrews.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never eat gooseberries on days of mourning.

5. Do not take Yokhimjop's name in vain.