Gutlidvol is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, clever coyote.

Gutlidvol created tapeworms seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gutlidvol, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Gutlidvol, he will send minions to preach to you.

Gutlidvol's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Gutlidvol's Holy Commandments

1. Erect four silver sculptures of Gutlidvol on top of important buildings.

2. Always help birds.

3. You must love Gutlidvol.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never feed lots of figs to whales while wearing yellow trousers.