Manyammeg Fadtipdum is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, idiotic newt.

Manyammeg Fadtipdum created snails two years ago.

If you believe in Manyammeg Fadtipdum, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Manyammeg Fadtipdum, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Manyammeg Fadtipdum's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Manyammeg Fadtipdum's Holy Commandments

1. Always maintain patience during holy days.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Feed all hungry cats.

5. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.