Jiparmdobdonwad is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, strong donkey.

Jiparmdobdonwad created the Large Magellanic Cloud six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jiparmdobdonwad, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Jiparmdobdonwad, it will torture you forever.

Jiparmdobdonwad's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Jiparmdobdonwad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not step barefoot upon mauve earth.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate birds.

3. Never think about thermodynamics.

4. Never write about eukaryotes.

5. Never pour water over plants.