Kabbestleg is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, overgenerous snail.

Kabbestleg created the planet Earth three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kabbestleg, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Kabbestleg, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Kabbestleg's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Kabbestleg's Holy Commandments

1. Always keep your back turned to the west at sunset.

2. Do not kill moths.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not trade with those who eat garlic.