Gigdutnill is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, selfish cow.

Gigdutnill created a photon two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gigdutnill, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Gigdutnill, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Gigdutnill's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Gigdutnill's Holy Commandments

1. Do not resist balance.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Do not travel during summer.

4. Always cleanse your hands after touching platinum.

5. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.