Ranzimweebog is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, overgenerous otter.

Ranzimweebog created the Andromeda Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Ranzimweebog, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Ranzimweebog, it will destroy your home solar system.

Ranzimweebog's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Ranzimweebog's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear red.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Never sing in the presence of elders.

4. Do not study eukaryotes on holy days.

5. Always look after injured manatees.