Basslistxem is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, slow penguin.

Basslistxem created the Sombrero Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Basslistxem, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Basslistxem, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Basslistxem's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Basslistxem's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Basslistxem.

2. Erect nine silicon sculptures of Basslistxem on top of important buildings.

3. Never speak of order in the presence of children.

4. Never record numbers.

5. Never wear purple skirts on sacred days.