Gebcissfas is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, selfish goose.

Gebcissfas created the Cigar Galaxy six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gebcissfas, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Gebcissfas, it will destroy your favourite star.

Gebcissfas' most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Gebcissfas' Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum field theory near badgers while wearing fawn jumpers and balancing five gold spheres on your neck.

2. Never discuss cell theory in public assemblies.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never talk about manatees.

5. Always obey Gebcissfas' priests.