Lidquafbess is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, slow spider.

Lidquafbess created life three billion years ago.

If you believe in Lidquafbess, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Lidquafbess, it will turn you into a puffin.

Lidquafbess' most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Lidquafbess' Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion sacred items from stone.

2. Do not speak about strawberries.

3. Always cleanse your hands after touching silver.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never think ill of sick capybaras.