Gubgatcud is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, quiet hydra.

Gubgatcud created a quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gubgatcud, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Gubgatcud, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Gubgatcud's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Gubgatcud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your chest.

2. Never record names.

3. Always look after injured moths.

4. Never prepare bananas during autumn.

5. Do not step barefoot upon yellow earth.