Midveenfet is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, deceitful cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Midveenfet created Africa nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Midveenfet, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Midveenfet, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Midveenfet's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Midveenfet's Holy Commandments

1. Never adorn your feet with cyan markings.

2. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Midveenfet on top of all buildings.

3. Never fashion tools from ash.

4. Never sing in holy places.

5. Do not count beyond six during ceremonies.