Volyikflig is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, contented naga.

Volyikflig created everything that exists nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Volyikflig, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Volyikflig, he will have a low opinion of you.

Volyikflig's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Volyikflig's Holy Commandments

1. Never remain standing at dawn.

2. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not prepare melons while filled with anger.

4. Never mix cherries with blood.

5. Do not contemplate quantum gravity during the night.