Dimyarpcab is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, generous beaver.

Dimyarpcab created carbon three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dimyarpcab, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dimyarpcab, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Dimyarpcab's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Dimyarpcab's Holy Commandments

1. Never whisper while facing north.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never eat strawberries on fasting days.

5. Never talk about black holes.