Gandogfomwaplannuttgut Garflabyarlzigfebhun is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, unthinking squid.

Gandogfomwaplannuttgut Garflabyarlzigfebhun created humankind five million years ago.

If you believe in Gandogfomwaplannuttgut Garflabyarlzigfebhun, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gandogfomwaplannuttgut Garflabyarlzigfebhun, she will boil you in a big pot.

Gandogfomwaplannuttgut Garflabyarlzigfebhun's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Gandogfomwaplannuttgut Garflabyarlzigfebhun's Holy Commandments

1. Never cross crossroads at midday.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never feed cucumbers to cats while wearing white scarves.

4. Never wear fawn skirts on sacred days.

5. Never write about eukaryotes.