Quilltarbig is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, contented gorilla.

Quilltarbig created the solar system three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quilltarbig, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Quilltarbig, it will destroy your home planet.

Quilltarbig's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Quilltarbig's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit in holy places.

2. Always check lakes for frogs.

3. Never talk about black holes.

4. Do not eat tomatoes.

5. Always make sure there are no aardvarks in a room before entering it.