Barngodgov is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, idiotic beaver.

Barngodgov created the world two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Barngodgov, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Barngodgov, he will send you a sign.

Barngodgov's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Barngodgov's Holy Commandments

1. Never record names.

2. Do not fashion tools from iron.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never feed lots of parsnips to rats while wearing magenta skirts.

5. Learn seven new languages a year.