Nartfubvag is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, happy octopus.

Nartfubvag created carbon eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nartfubvag, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Nartfubvag, he will destroy your favourite star.

Nartfubvag's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Nartfubvag's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in indigo.

2. Always maintain obedience during days of mourning.

3. Do not keep four badgers in a large pit.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Always make sure there are no ants in a room before entering it.