Rowsafart Bogyikjen is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, generous chicken.

Rowsafart Bogyikjen created an atom eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Rowsafart Bogyikjen, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Rowsafart Bogyikjen, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Rowsafart Bogyikjen's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Rowsafart Bogyikjen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not place peanuts upon stone.

2. Never remain kneeling at midday.

3. Do not count beyond five during ceremonies.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.