Gepmutvag is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, annoying yak.

Gepmutvag created the Cigar Galaxy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Gepmutvag, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gepmutvag, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Gepmutvag's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Gepmutvag's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak aloud of numbers.

2. You must love Gepmutvag.

3. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never eat bark.