Loprawlat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, self-confident giraffe.

Loprawlat created humanity three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Loprawlat, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Loprawlat, it will be mildly annoyed.

Loprawlat's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Loprawlat's Holy Commandments

1. Pray only in shadows.

2. Always act with obedience when addressing strangers.

3. Never handle nickel while unclean.

4. Never mix pineapples with oil.

5. Never speak the names of dwarf planets aloud.