Jonxucktip is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, witless gerbil.

Jonxucktip created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jonxucktip, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Jonxucktip, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Jonxucktip's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Jonxucktip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear magenta clothing.

2. Retreat if three badgers approach from the south.

3. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a building before entering it.

4. Never sing in winter.

5. Do not cook food in pots.