Tomtofbon is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, charitable badger.

Tomtofbon created the Small Magellanic Cloud five billion years ago.

If you believe in Tomtofbon, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tomtofbon, he will send minions to preach to you.

Tomtofbon's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Tomtofbon's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Tomtofbon on top of all buildings.

2. Always help sick tortoises.

3. Never think about asteroids.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tomtofbon.

5. Never handle aluminium while unclean.