Hadapphud is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, all-powerful spider.

Hadapphud created humankind four million years ago.

If you believe in Hadapphud, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Hadapphud, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Hadapphud's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Hadapphud's Holy Commandments

1. Always act with obedience.

2. Never paint your face magenta.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hadapphud.

4. Do not shave your legs.

5. Do not drink alcohol.