Staftafbeg is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, awe-inspiring owl.

Staftafbeg created the Sunflower Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Staftafbeg, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Staftafbeg, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Staftafbeg's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Staftafbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear tights marked with green.

2. Never tolerate laughter in holy places.

3. Do not eat parsnips.

4. Never prepare tomatoes during winter.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.