Flatwabcun is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, slow shark.

Flatwabcun created the Small Magellanic Cloud six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flatwabcun, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Flatwabcun, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Flatwabcun's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Flatwabcun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not consume garlic at dawn.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Heed all signs.

4. Never gather three tapirs near bridges.

5. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.