Hugwonvid is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, unthinking hamster.

Hugwonvid created humanity five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hugwonvid, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Hugwonvid, she will turn you into a worm.

Hugwonvid's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Hugwonvid's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat wheat.

2. Do not hurt dogs.

3. Do not run in public.

4. Do not gather at walls at dusk.

5. Do not dye your hair fawn.