Tailtap is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, happy gnu.

Tailtap created Asia eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Tailtap, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Tailtap, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Tailtap's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Tailtap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not kill snails.

3. Learn three new languages a year.

4. You must love Tailtap.

5. Never speak the names of stars aloud.