Stafditlap is a god.

He takes the form of a large, pitiless dugong.

Stafditlap created parasitic wasps two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stafditlap, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Stafditlap, he will turn you into a puffin.

Stafditlap's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Stafditlap's Holy Commandments

1. Stafditlap must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Never wear kilts.

3. Do not hurt gulls.

4. Do not record signs concerning asteroids.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.