Linbeg is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, amazing shrew.

Linbeg created tapeworms three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Linbeg, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Linbeg, she will not care at all.

Linbeg's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Linbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never talk about bacteria.

3. Never talk about solid mechanics near nematodes while wearing violet jumpers and balancing four nickel spheres on your feet.

4. Never gather six swans in one place.

5. Never look in ponds.