Dimstiprip Rilmiphan is a god.

She takes the form of a large, omnipotent dolphin.

Dimstiprip Rilmiphan created oxygen four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dimstiprip Rilmiphan, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Dimstiprip Rilmiphan, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Dimstiprip Rilmiphan's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Dimstiprip Rilmiphan's Holy Commandments

1. Never mark doors with fawn.

2. Never gather five otters near wells.

3. Do not take Dimstiprip Rilmiphan's name in vain.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not resist balance.